Friday, March 16, 2007

Get A Job! (Thursday Thirteen #10)

Yesterday was not one of my better days. I had to go to the Oral Surgeon to start treatment for the crazy amount of damage I have done to my teeth and jaw from clenching my teeth all day and night.

Due to an oh-so-very-long-story, I have become a bit (ok, quite a bit) fearful of medical procedures and the people who wear masks while performing them. I took one look at the stuff on the medical tray and decided that the equipment that the oral surgeon uses to extract teeth is the exact same equipment that Jack Bauer uses to extract information from people on “24”.

I freaked.....and by “freaked” I mean started hyperventilating and ran out of there.

After pulling myself together, I went back in, clenched my eyes shut tight and completed the mission that I went there to do.

It dawned on me that, considering my bizarre anxieties, being a bad guy on “24” would not be a good career choice for me.

Today is Friday, but yesterday was Thursday Thirteen...here’s mine...(better late than never)


Thirteen JOBS THAT ARE NOT FOR ME


1. Any occupation that would require you to touch a cotton ball. I am terrified of cotton balls. Pharmacist, Doctor, Nurse, Phlebotomist, Elementary School Art Teacher. I couldn’t do any of those jobs unless cotton balls were banned from the premises.

2. Police Officer. This was my career goal in college. I went on a ride-a-long and discovered I am terribly afraid of people that I don’t know who are pointing guns out the window of their car. Nope, not the job for me. I did, however, make a fabulous Police/Fire/EMS Dispatcher and 911 Operator.

3. Pedicurist. Touching people's feet? Ummmm, no thanks.

4. Flight Attendant. I know they are safer than cars. I still can’t breathe on airplanes.

5. Ladder climber. I don’t like them.

6. Roofer. Not only do I not like the ladder climb, I don’t like being anywhere where if the wind picks up, you could just blow right off causing you to fall to the very-far-away ground below.

7. Window Washer. Same reason.

8. Biker Chick. It's not the motorcycle that scares me. It's falling off. I think I will remain a feet planted on the ground Rock Chick.

9. Roller Coaster Rider. I have enough ups and downs with anxiety. Don't need any more!

10. Santa’s Elf. I’m not all that crazy about Santa either since a former co-worker tried to kiss me wearing a Santa costume with a beard made of.....cotton balls! I can tolerate Santa once a year. Don't think I could work with him on a daily basis.

11. Fingernail model. Because I bite mine.

12. Sword Swallower. My TMJ has limited my ability to open my mouth. There is no way I could open my mouth wide enough to do this.

13. Porn Star. See #12. Enough said.

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!


Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!



7 comments:

Uisce said...

I didn't know you could get a job as a ladder climber. I am wicked afraid of heights, so I couldn't do that job either.

Kathy said...

Another great TT! I think I actually agree with ALL of your opinions on these weird jobs, with the exception of being an elem ed art teacher. I think that would be a good one despite having to work with cotton balls all the time. Health occupations disgust me...why anyone would pursue that line of career is beyond me. I just get nauseous (sp?) & faint when I walk into a hospital. I hated being in a hospital just to birth my three kids!

Carol said...

I'm a teacher - so I can handle the cotton balls. I got a good laugh out of #13 which referred back to #12. Funny! I had the same phobia about dentists - especially. I got over it when I forced myself to go the nitrous oxide route - and it works for me. I feel a little light-headed at first - but it eases my anxiety.

MarillaAnne said...

Hey! I have to say I am sooo impressed that you managed to pull yourself back together and go back in. If I had started running, I would have been to humiliated by running to have turned around and gone back in. Uh... yeah ... not that I would know by personal experience or anything ;~)

I actually got my T13 up on thursday this time -- just barely ... and i'm just getting to go out visiting today ... so you're doing fine!

ttyl
pam

Lady G~ said...

LOL! Great list. Your #1 made me laugh. Soaring Amongst The Clouds (my 19 year old daughter) HATES cotton balls. I didn't realize there were others like her. :o)

I've never seen a porn movie, so I didn't understand when you said see #12 on #13. I had to ask my Knight. He ahh... clarified that for me. LOL!

So, how's the belly dancing going?

Melessa said...

Thanks for visiting my TT! In my mind, I would make a great biker chick. (And if you knew me in person, you would be laughing at that mental picture.) I'm not a big fan of feet and/or touching them either.

Ctina said...

Hahaha! Your #1 made me laugh out loud! As did your #13...very fun list! :)