Jailhouse Rock

Sometimes I miss the good old days. You know those long lost days, when corrupt politicians weren’t wiretapped and overheard trying to sell open Senate seats, they were intelligent enough to meet in parks and have secret meetings hiding themselves behind opened newspapers and whispering the details of their nefarious plots.


Can you believe this scandal with Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich?

I think everyone knew something was coming because for several years he’s been rumored to be the infamous “Public Official A” in a federal investigation into corruption in the State of Illinois and this alias was confirmed earlier this year. (Before you ask, I have no idea as to the identities of B-Z.)

But trying to sell Obama’s open Senate seat? Attempting to shake down the CEO of Chicago’s Children’s Memorial Hospital for campaign contributions in exchange for $8 million in healthcare funding? Calling the President Elect a “bleep” because he won’t appoint Blagojevich’s corrupt ass to the post of Secretary of Health and Human Services? Complaining that he only makes $172,000 a year? Poor baby. Why idiot would anyone choose public service if lots of money were their main objective?

As a citizen of Illinois, I would like to give Gov. Blagojevich something. I’d be more than happy to provide this dumbass, greedy bleeping jerk with free high security government housing for say, oh, 20-30 years. In the form of a cell.

U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitgerald commented that this conduct would make “lincoln turn over in his grave.” I think this behavior would even make Nixon turn over in his, too.

The audacity, I tell ya. Don’t drop the soap, Blago. “Jailhouse Rock” has more than one meaning, you know.